Too Many Beautiful Souls

Feb 8, 2019, 1:27 PM

It's one things to cry around your friends and family, its another to sob in a room full of strangers. And to be the only one crying. Most people at the Lakewood Civic Center saw the darkest side of the opioid epidemic as we watched "Chasing the Dragon" last night. I saw the worst nightmare of my life played out on screen. In several cases, I watched the worst possible outcomes played out. It was almost like watching "Let's make a deal for heroin addicts" as it pertains to Sam. He can choose door number 1, 2, or 3 when he eventually gets out of jail/prison, and here is what each outcome will look like. In my face. It was dreadful and painful and humbling but I am glad I stayed.

I nearly walked out when the mayor of Lakewood started the forum by addressing the opioid epidemic saying that while it is a national epidemic, its really not so much of a problem in our Lakewood area as of now, followed by a panel that somewhat supported and agreed with him. They also talked how their area of expertise is dealing with the issue. It started like an awkward version of middle school drug night. A brief summary of my take away: "CTFD people, we got this. We aren't Ohio after all, where the epidemic is ravishing entire communities. And, by the way, this whole epidemic started with the dangerous gateway drug, pot."

Yes, they specifically referenced Ohio, like the miles between them and us should make us feel better because nothing that happens there could possibly ever happen here. My son overdosed on heroin less than four miles from where we sat in that meeting last night. His first drug was alcohol, his second vanilla. Any drug can be a gateway drug so don't take two hours of my life, after I have made countless trips to hell and back, to give me the basic drug talk and make the community think that this epidemic is a big deal but completely under control in OUR neighborhoods here on the west side. And, also, don't try to slide the focus back to marijuana. That would be called "A community forum on the detrimental effects of Marijuana in our society." A perfectly valid discussion, but not for last night. It's too broad and it minimizes and diverts the crisis. Anyone who chooses to spend an evening of their time at a community meeting about a topic like heroin and opioids knows a little something about the topic. Meet us where we are.

Since I was the first one to talk after they opened the discussion (no one else was willing to), I told the panel that they sounded somewhat complacent and that I don't understand why they are trying to make the public feel that this is not as big of a deal in our area and also make them feel uncomfortable about using narcan themselves. They said they are always 4 1/2 minutes away from any emergency and carry their own narcan, (cops, firefighters, paramedics) therefore we shouldn't worry. That sounds like a hell of a long time of unnecessary wait for someone who is already dead. Who cares if an addict gets sick and angry after you spray narcan up their nose? I am pretty sure we can all out smart a violently ill heroin addict who might be a little pissed off. There can be a lot of puking, crapping, and mind numbing pain going on as they withdrawal, you aren't going to be their sole focus.

Fortunately, after the community started talking, the panel stepped up to the plate and attempted to get more real. I am grateful that the executive director of Public Healthcare in Jefferson county, Dr. Johnson, seems to understand this crisis and the importance of expanding accessibility to narcan in our society.

Each and every opioid addict had a time when it wasn't so. Their addiction did not exist in the forefront of their lives and they were as much a part of the future as anyone else. I would give anything to go back and try to short circuit history so I could change the past for Sam.

I am glad people are talking. Its always best to talk about potential impending disasters before they happen in our direct communities. More lives get saved that way.

The day my Sam is a free man will mark the beginning of the most dangerous period of his life. The risk of relapse and overdose is extremely high after prolonged sobriety. Therefore, I have personal interest in expanding and normalizing narcan, it could save his life some day. Any so many others.

Where there is life, there is hope. #nomoreshame